worst private equity pitch

What’s the worst private equity pitch you’ve seen?

December 8, 2015

How to lose respect and alienate investors

I asked the LP panel at SuperInvestor 2015 what the worst private equity pitch they’ve ever seen was. On the panel were Catherine Lewis La Torre, Anna Dayn, Spencer Miller and Marc der Kinderen.

Between them, they review 400 fund pitches every year and they’ve seen them all – the good, the bad and the ugly. Of those, they eventually invest in about 10 of them.

The pitches they recalled as the worst show how a single snapshot of the fund manager’s behaviour forms the basis of the investor’s decision whether or not to continue the conversation.

Here are four pitch mistakes you definitely don’t want to replicate:

Worst private equity pitch | No. 1: The sleepy fund manager

Anna Dayn recalled a first-time meeting with a fund manager from Asia. Five or six men were sat across the table talking when their colleague at the end fell asleep. Anna advises, “Get in your Zzzs ahead of the meeting because that just looked awful to us.”

Worst private equity pitch | No. 2: The unbalanced fund manager

Catherine Lewis La Torre told us about a group who spent an hour talking about one of the weaker companies in their portfolio.  It gave the impression they did not know how to focus. They should have used their time more wisely.

Worst private equity pitch | No. 3: The injured fund manager

Spencer Miller met a managing partner who asked if he could lie down as he had a bad back. From the boardroom floor he then proceeded with his pitch. Spencer said, “I didn’t know whether to sit down at the table or on the floor with him.”

Worst private equity pitch | No. 4: The egotistical fund manager

Marc der Kinderen spoke of a group of six or seven professionals who came to deliver a pitch. He was impressed that so many were in attendance, and was looking forward to a strong presentation. But the founder had other ideas, reeling off his own achievements in one long stream of ‘I bought… I did… I sold… I made…’. Marc added, “The moment that one of his juniors began to speak, the founder took out his iPhone and started emailing. That was enough. We want teams, not one guy.”

 

Professional support will give you the best chance of success

Benjamin Ball Associates prepares private equity teams for investor presentations. We combine our knowledge of the private equity sector with executive coaching, pitch polishing and intensive role-play. We can support the pitches and presentations of both funds and portfolio companies, maximising your chances of securing investment.

If you want to improve your pitch to investors call Louise on 020 7193 0130 or email louise@nullbenjaminball.com. We’ll make your pitch confident, memorable and effective: one of the best your prospective investors experience, rather than the worst.

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